5 Hottest TV Commercial Girls, And Another IвЂ™d Like To Kill.
The best part about funemployment (wow, that word is even douchier in print) is that when youвЂ™re not busy getting turned down for unpaid internships, you get to watch TV.
A LOT of TV. Like, вЂњUgh, KidвЂ™s Jeopardy again?вЂќ a lot.
Bottom line is I started noticing how many girls in commercials IвЂ™d marry. So hereвЂ™s my top five TV ad ladies, plus another fictional one I’d like to kill, and as always I look forward to reading your disparaging remarks in the comments below.
5. Shark Week Reporter: Tracy Pendergast.
Perhaps sheвЂ™s only making the list because almost as much as I love that commercial, I love the fact that it pissed off bitchy soccer moms and PETA members everywhere. She looks even better when you get her out of that news reporter getup:
ThereвЂ™s just something about that Brooklyn nose…or maybe it’s just the breasts.
4. Cute, Gullible Girl: Mariel Booth.
So this is the one where the girl is getting picked up by that hideous ogre of a human being because she thinks heвЂ™s a French model. IвЂ™m not going to get into commercial critiques, but that premise was so fucking stupid IвЂ™m preventing gullible girl from being any further down the list.
3. DirecTV Goddess: Hannah Davis.
In my experience, views on this genie are fairly polarized, but I can tell you this: if she let me have a threesome, of wishes sheвЂ™d be my firstвЂ”actually that makes no sense. SheвЂ™d be my third wish, after, of course, the next two girls on the list.
2. Charlie SheenвЂ™s Slam: Catrinel Menghia.
Leave it to the Bro King himself, Charlie Sheen, to pair up with this dime, or should I say donna bella, straight out of Milan, Italy:
As a former half black coworker of mine used to say, “Oh GodвЂ”DAMN!”
Okay, ciao bella, onto number oneвЂ¦
1. The Girl From 4E: Holly Lynch.
Gotta hand it to State Farm, they really know where their priorities lie. The girl from 4E makes my top spot because while, yeah sheвЂ™s a bombshell, sheвЂ™s also so believable! And when it comes to hot TV commercial women that I’m judging and writing articles on, I hold that factor in high regard. Holly (seriously though, she looks way more like a Kylie or a Kelly) is like one of those hidden gems over in Customer Service, even though she should really be in Sales because you canвЂ™t see that sultry face over the phone. Of course I’d imagine sheвЂ™s easy on the ears, too.
A little internet research confirmed that sheвЂ™s also this girl here from that Corona commercial. IвЂ™d recognize that coy smile any day:
вЂњSo Holly, whadaya say we kill a few more of these $12 Coronas and find out how flexible you are?вЂќ.
This is about the most revealing picture out there of her, definitely adds to her favorable “good girl” image.
The One I’d Kill: Flo From Progressive.
And lastly, for the ending youвЂ™d probably rather not have at all, this annoying C-U-Next Tuesday:
I like to think her Criminal Minds-esque death would be called the вЂњFlo, No MoвЂ™!вЂќ.
Without going into too much detail, it would probably involve (at the least) a baseball bat, a giant tank of bleach, a modified paper shredder, Aaron Hernandez,В and finally, one grateful TV-viewing America.
David Hoover (DHoov206) is a Seattle native who frequently pretends he is Macklemore’s younger brother. He talks in the 3rd person because he’s arrogant, and was once voluntarily questioned by the FBI in regards to something he tweeted. Gonzaga University alumnus of ’13. (Well, he might be short a class but he’s convinced no one actually checks for diplomas.)
In my “Kill, Bang, Marry” of TV commercial girls Flo is all three.
I’m about to get “progressive” on Flo with some Huey Lewis and The News and a chain saw.
Am I the only one who has it for the Wendy’s redhead?
Maybe it’s just the breasts? It’s definitely just the breasts. Didn’t even realize she had a nose until you mentioned it.
Flo makes $500,000 a year. bullshit.
The Flo radio commercials are even worse. It literally takes all my self control not to drive off an overpass when they come on in the AM.
If I have to hear one more Flo commercial on Pandora…
If I could kill one person in the world, it would be Flo.